There is much criticism on internet blockers in the community. It is true that they are no Fort Knox and will not keep a determined soul away from porn, at least not for long.
But I would defend the blockers. They are good at what they are designed to do, which isn’t to be impassable defenses. Regardless, I think they have a lot of value.
Some of them are even free, making them a very cost effective tool to reduce the chances of a relapse.
Which is exactly their point.
They will reduce your urges by enforcing a safe search on google, and preventing websites that might have triggers.
Furthermore, they offer some extra time before a relapse for you to realize where your actions are leading and remove yourself from the situation.
But any blocker must be set-up properly to provide the maximum security we are after.
If you are not familiar with it, K9 is a free program with which you can block your online activities with. Here are steps that you can take to maximize the potential of K9.
Every blocker needs a password to be useful and it is a requirement in K9. But the smart thing to do is not to make one you can remember, quite the opposite.
Set a K9 password which even after multiple repeats you will not be able to remember.
Just slap your face, hand or any other appendage of your body on the keyboard repeatedly until you have a long list of letters and numbers.
As an extra measure, make the password the maximum length as well to further prevent any recall.
But write it first into a text document and then copy-paste it to be the K9 password.
This is important, because if you set an unknown random password you are up for much annoyance at best, and royally fucked at worst.
Once everything is set up, copy your password onto a piece of paper by hand. Old school, I know.
Old being gold, you can now delete the text document from your computer after double checking that you have copied the password correctly onto the paper.
Step 1, complete.
This idea comes from much annoyance in parties. Instead of everyone present having a fun time with each other, the modern youth being what it is, were always stuck on their phone.
Soon enough a change was enforced with punishments to those who looked at their phones.
But the punishments were often not enough, so the next idea was to by this.
The idea, although brilliant, was soon disregard for the fact that if someone ended up getting injured, we might have to wait multiple hours before calling for help. Too much time to bleed out, the carpet might have gotten ruined.
Yet the idea stuck and soon afterwards I came up with the idea of using the same concept for rebooting.
The fact that K9 was too easy to unlock, even from a password outside the computer, had always bothered me. It undermined the whole point of the blocker.
The timed safe box solves this problem.
You can now put the handwritten password into the box. Make sure you wrap up the paper so that none of the password is visible without physically accessing the paper itself. This won’t be a problem if you buy the white base box though.
Drop the paper in the box and set the timer for however many hours it currently is until the next morning. Why next morning? I’ll get to that a little later.
If you are feeling uneasy about spending 49 dollars on a safe box consider this: would you be willing to spend that 49 amount of dollars if it were a pill that instantly rebooted you?
This concept can be that powerful. Besides, if you answered no, then I suggest you reflect whether you want to recover at all.
The natural alternative to this is to have your accountability buddy set a password. He can keep you accountable checking the K9 logs of your online activity.
When the result is that you accountability buddy finds out and slaps you, relapsing doesn’t sound so good anymore, does it?
A further benefit is that you don’t necessarily have to wait until the next morning to unlock a website you need to access.
Did you figure out why I told you to set the timer to the next morning?
In my experience, K9 has a learning curve. The default settings are excellent and it is easy to add your own wishes to the blocked list as well as the exceptions list.
But it also blocks some harmless websites. It is hard to foresee what these are, so the learning curve is finding out and setting them to be exceptions.
Have a text document or notebook at hand during your online time to jot down any websites you need set as an exception. A text document is best for this, because you can copy-paste the website address into the K9 exceptions.
But to set any website as an exception requires the administrator password. The one in the box.
So setting the “lockdown” to always last until the next morning allows you to use the password to set exceptions every morning.
If you do not need to, then simply reset the time for the next morning.
If you do, make it fast and then reset it. And if you find yourself having an urge, re-lock the password as soon as possible.
This is the most willpower heavy moment of this process so let’s not take any chances.
Remember to change the password as soon as you even might remember it. Otherwise the whole “what’s in the box” situation becomes completely useless.
This still doesn’t remove the fact that blockers aren’t impenetrable. You can even break the lockbox if you want it badly enough. Not to mention that no blocker knows 100% of adult themed websites.
All this does is put more obstacles between you and relapsing. Those might come in handy when that weak moment comes along.
Speaking of weak moments, even if you do not opt for this method of K9 use, it still has uses in dealing with urges. Feel one coming on? Block everything and put your password in there for a couple of hours!
- Get yourself some kind of timed lock box
- Dowload and set-up K9
- Set random administrative password and jot it down on paper
- Set exceptions of safe websites you frequently visit
- Place the password to the box and set timer
- Repeat until reboot is complete
- Pat yourself on the back for working smart, not hard